She shakes her head again, firmer. Her voice comes a little quieter:

"It was just a Hail Mary, Arthur. I knew I only had a couple hours left to live. If I wasn't already completely fucked, I probably wouldn't have done it."

But she's not so sure of that, either. It's difficult to say what she would have thought or done if things were different. It's impossible to comb out whether it was for Ellie or the world at all, or just for her own conscience.