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[dog_eat_dog]

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[toabsolution]

He's refusing to think about port and the memories he gained. That's a problem he can't really solve. So he's choosing to think about this problem that he might be able to solve. He opens his door so he doesn't have to answer it when she comes and sits down at his table with a drink.

[dog_eat_dog]

Tess lets herself in without knocking; for her there's a particular feeling of entitlement that goes into being in a quasi-relationship with someone. She's never really minded being bold.

She joins him at the table, sidling right into his space to kiss him.

[toabsolution]

He likes her bold, and she's always full of surprises. He pulls her close, brushing light fingers along the back of her neck.

"Good afternoon," he says with a laugh. "Nice to see you recognize me this time."

[dog_eat_dog]

She grins as he breaks the kiss, lingering with his touch and then deciding to just seat herself on his lap.

"I'm disappointed you didn't take advantage of that whole damsel-in-distress thing on the roadside," she teases. "Could've been a fun thing to think back on."

[toabsolution]

It didn't seem right. Not when she wasn't herself. Not when he was busy chasing ghosts.

He doesn't say that. He just grins, accepting her weight in his lap. "Yeah, well, ranchers ain't my type," he teases. "Close your eyes."

[dog_eat_dog]

Tess chuckles, closing her eyes.

"I wanna know what your type is, then."

[toabsolution]

He shifts underneath her, fishing something out of his pocket. "You should be able to figure it out by now." He loops a necklace around her neck. Colored glass beads, laced onto a ribbon, tied in the back.

"Ain't pearls but...did what I could."

[dog_eat_dog]

She knows what it is the moment she feels it settle against her collarbone, and for an instant, she feels so much younger than she is, positively tickled by the gesture. She opens her eyes and can't quite look at it, but she knows it's there and it's hers, and that's what matters.

"Oh, you're good," she says, touching her fingertips to it and then pressing another kiss on him.

[toabsolution]

He laughs, deep in his chest, and happily accepts that kiss without pushing. "Looks good on you," he tells her, not addressing it. He knows he can be smooth when he wants to be.

"You really doin' alright?"

[dog_eat_dog]

"Thank you," she replies –– for the necklace and the compliment –– and she nods. "I'm alright. Lots of shit going on but for once, I'm fine."

She wraps an arm around his neck, leaning into him.

"You?"

[toabsolution]

He pulls her close, just feeling her weight against him.

The silence after her question should speak volumes. But, just in case, he speaks up. "Been better."

[dog_eat_dog]

"Yeah?" She idly runs a finger along his shoulder. "Something go down in port?"

[toabsolution]

He takes a breath, gathering his words. "Ghosts," he answers. "Nothin' but fuckin' ghosts."

[dog_eat_dog]

It was pretty close to home, wasn’t it? She supposes that makes sense.

“Did you remember something?”

[toabsolution]

He considers telling her about Alice or Ella, but that seems like very dangerous territory. Instead, he goes the easier route. "Bit about my gang," he decides. "Seein' 'em around. Shit we did. Trains we robbed. One where...we left a man behind."

[dog_eat_dog]

She knows that feeling, at least.

"Sorry, Jake. That shit's unavoidable and it never gets easier."

[toabsolution]

"Ain't about bein' easy. And not about the man we left. We did what we had to to save the others," he says softly. "It's...about it still bein' someone else. Like I'm rememberin' the breach."

[dog_eat_dog]

"So that was your life then, and this is your life now," she tells him. What else can she say? She's never lost her memories, but she does know the strict delineation between a before-time and an after. She imagines that's at least a little similar.

She runs a finger along his jaw.

"And maybe it's going to come back in time, but you can't just fret over the past."

[toabsolution]

"Ain't frettin'," he tells her, turning into her touch slightly. He hadn't had a chance to shave much and there's stubble already growing there.

"More like..." He sighs, a bit frustrated in his inability to explain it. "How much of it is me now?"

[dog_eat_dog]

"However much you want it to be," she replies, letting her hand drift down the side of his neck. "Think of it as a fresh slate. You can leave behind whatever you want."

[toabsolution]

"Don't think that's how it works," he laughs, already starting to brush it off. Seems cowardly, he wants to say, but he knows that's exactly what it is.

Still, if sits here with Tess, he can believe it. He can believe it's the right thing to do.

"Ain't much to worry about now. You catch up with Arthur after it all? Saw him there. Wasn't good for him, either."

[dog_eat_dog]

"Sure it does," Tess insists, and she only grudgingly moves to the next topic.

She heaves a big sigh.

"He went a little wild and fucked around with the wrong people, and he looks like hell for it," she replies. God, she'll be chasing after him to poke at his wounds for the next week or two. She knows full-well that he's just fine, but a lifetime of playing infection roulette makes her fussy about that stuff. "But he'll be alright, he's resilient."

[toabsolution]

"Been days of dramatics after a fuckin' weird port. We all need a little rest, but...Kick his ass for me, hm? When he's feeling better."

He remembers sitting with him on that ledge, feeling like he might just want to fly apart. Instead of thinking about it, he brushes his lips against hers in a kiss.

[dog_eat_dog]

She's about to say she will –– even though she won't, can't imagine laying a finger on him, even in jest, at least as long as he wouldn't lay a finger on her –– but Jake kisses her and it shuts her up, at least for a moment. Somewhere in the midst of making out she considers that Jake never wants to talk about Arthur even when he's the one who brings him up, but fine, whatever, fuck it –– Jake's been keeping her on edge for weeks now and she's going to take whatever she can get.

[toabsolution]

The kiss is not a distraction; it's a stalling tactic. One that he is more than happy to employ so he can get his thoughts together. So when he pulls away, he reaches up to brush fingers through her hair and steels himself.

"How long you think we can keep this up without him findin' out?" he asks cautiously. What he really wants to say is that he also broke down and said something at port, but he wisely keeps that to himself.